Ghosting: Is it ever OK to do?

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Ghosting seems like a popular new trend that’s hit the dating scene this year, which is when people literally ghost all together off the scene from someone they had been dating.

To me, it’s pretty childish. And the only concept of ghosting I ever saw merely acceptable was when I was in primary school. It was Year 6 and one of my friends was dating a boy in my class and later on realised she didn’t fancy him and avoided him altogether on the playground. It wasn’t nice but at that age, y’know it’s not that serious and they’d only been dating a week, they weren’t like the other couple in our year who’d got married in the local park after school.

However in this day and age, it seems increasingly common after personally hearing various stories from friends of people they’d been dating who did a disappearing act out of the blue. Maybe it has something to do with the popularity of online dating apps such as Tinder which you can find someone to date by the swipe of the finger or maybe not many young people aren’t up for serious relationships and just want to stick to casual dating?

Also, compared to previous generations it’s likely that the scope of dating has changed. PlentyOfFish Resident Dating Expert and PR Coordinator, Kate MacLean said following a survey revealing millennials’ dating habits “Online dating has provided a large pool of potential partners we may have never met otherwise. The extensive number of people we’re able to meet now, paired with the convenience of hiding behind a device, and lower likelihood of running into someone after a breakup, are all points that we can attribute to the rising trend of ghosting in younger generations.”

Dating, Sex & Relationships Blogger, Naomi Narrative shared her take on the ghosting trend: “Ghosting can, and will remain to be, pretty devastating. Each time you meet up with someone in which you have a significant romantic interest, you make a great effort to build on the bond between the both of you that you feel is becoming stronger. When that bond becomes broken, feelings get hurt and the guard you’ve worked so hard to drop slowly starts to work it’s way up again.”

We also asked some young people to share what they thought about it:

Jamie, 22 “It’s a cowardly way to handle things”

Sandra, 18 “I get it if you aren’t that serious and you’re just not feeling it anymore, but it can be a bit crap liking someone and being on the receiving end of it”

Laura, 21 “I don’t get why people can’t just break things off, at the very least by text message. I think it’s really lame and immature to do that to someone”

Andrea, 21 “In this day and age, people aren’t so fussed about commitment so I can see why people ghost. I think it’s just something part of our generation’s way of dating”

Ryan, 19 “It’s messed up. If you break up with someone, have the balls to tell them why.”

Feel free to comment below what you think about ghosting – is it perfectly acceptable or it’s not cool to do?

Hope and Vicky are your lifestyle editors.

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